8.85dp5dt and BFN

POAS today and it was a BFN. I wasn't too surprised since it was negative 2 days ago. As well as everything went, I know that ivf is not a sure thing so I am not completely devastated although you hope that you are one of the lucky ones that gets pregnant on your first try. But I am faithful that it will work. I'll await my beta on Monday and see what the RE says. I may need to do a laparoscopy to improve my chances on the right side. In the meantime, I'll hold on to the small chance that my beta on Monday will yield better results.

6dp5dt

Today is day 6 post transfer and I'm starting to get a little nervous. I've been doing really well at keeping my nerves at bay...but for some reason today is different. I'm usually poas addict but for some reason I can't seem to get myself to poas. That is because I know too much. I know that implantation is completed by day 5. I know that on day 6 hcg starts to be secreted into the bloodstream, so a test today would be a good indication. But for some reason, I'm not ready to know the outcome.

Currently, I'm not having much symptoms, maybe slight cramping but that could be due to anything, and increased flatulence, I have been eating alot of beans lately. Either way, I didn't expect to have too many symptoms, after all stims were a breeze for me except super sore boobs. I do know that I will test before my beta on oct 1. In the meantime I'm claiming PUPO👯👯👯👯

Transfer day

D-day has finally come. Our 4 embies are still holding strong. My appt was at 12:30pm, and I got to the clinic at about 11:15am with a full bladder. My stomach still feels bloated/painful from stims/ER. I was called back about 12:07pm. The doc came in and basically wanted to transfer 1 embryo. He said based on my age and embryo quality, he feels that I am a good candidate for eSET. Hmmm...but yet I wasn't "qualified" for the shared risk program... Anyway, I decided to go with 2 embies. First because my girl Kiki had the same talk for eSET, and she ended up with a singleton, second, the other 3 were not guaranteed to make it to freeze but they plan on watching it for 2 more days, so I figured if I'm going to possibly lose the anyway, then why not put it back insure and lastly, I wouldn't mind haven't twins. My mom would be ECSTATIC. So 2 were put back in at 12:30pm and now the waiting begins. I PUPO with twins. I'm feeling pretty good besides the abdominal discomfort. I am hopeful. I took today today and tomorrow just to take it easy. I'm not sure if the hoopla about the bed rest is really true. Read somewhere that it really doesn't make a difference, but more for piece of mind. Which make sense because fertiles are not on bed rest. I decided to take an extra day off just for zen. My beta is scheduled for October 1st. I will likely test before then. But without further, meet my babies (the embryologist said "here are picture of your babies", I like the sound of that :-)

Retrieval Day Recap

My retrieval was set for 7am, so had to be at clinic at 6:00am.  DH came in for the evening to take me and give a fresh sample.  I didn't feel too nervous for the day because I was happy with the amount of follicles I had stimulated.  Aside from my super elevated e2, I was feeling ok. 

When we got there, about 6:11am, we waited in the waiting for about 15min, then were called to pre-op.  I then got changed into my gown.  The nurse came in to take my vitals, etc, then the anesthesiologist came in. He was actually the same guy I had for my hysteroscopy.  I was calm during the whole process.  The doc came and introduced himself. I asked him if he were any good at retrievals...hey you never know...he said he was...and that was that. 

I was wheeled into the room and went into lala land.  When I awoke, I felt a little dizzy with some slight cramping, but overall I felt fine.  The doc came in and told me that he was NOT able to get to my right ovary because it was stuck behind my uterus, and had he tried any harder, he could have done some damage to the uterus.....ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME??????

Don't get me wrong....at the end of the day, I just want a live baby, and all it takes is one right??? However, we all know that the more you get, the higher your chances. I am grateful that he did not do any damage to get to my right ovary but it still sucked, especially since my right had most of the mature follicles and SEVEN follicles.  We ended up getting 5 from the left and I am grateful for that.

We got home and I was feeling fine, and was even going to go into work, but my boss said no. Glad I didn't go because my stomach started hurting pretty bad.  I rested for most of the night.  Praying for good news in the morning.

Stim Day 10

Today I had to drive all the way to Rockville for my bw/us because I had to pick up cetrotide.  it didn't help that I was out late last night AND I have to be at work for 9am.  My appt was for 7:45am...yea right.  I got there in an hour, doing like 70-80mph.  I know. I figured I should get all of this recklessness out of my system before the baby gets here.  I get to the clinic about 8:11 and had to give myself cetritide by 8:36AM.  Thats the time I did it the day before at the rest room at the RE's office.  See, to me, the most important med is cetrotide to prevent ovulation.  According to the pamphlet, its good for 24 hours..So I make sure to take it within 24 hours of the previous dose.

As I'm sitting in the waiting room it's now 8:22AM and i'm wondering how this shot is going to go down.  I get called at 8:23AM for by blood work and get into the room at 8:25AM for my US.  As I'm sitting on the exam table waiting for my nurse to enter, I mix the meds and inject by 8:32AM...Yippeeeee

So doc comes in with the nurse just to see.  he is satified with my growth and my progress EXCEPT for my lining which is now at 6.5mm.  He did say that "it was not good".  A little ominous if you ask me, but then again I still have at least 5 more days before transfer.  I looked online for natural ways to increase your lining...so i'm going to buy some plums, apples, black eye peas, mushrooms and cherries. i already do oatmeal in the morning.  Not sure if I want to add rasberry leaf tree.  But this will be my diet until.....who knows...

My e2 came in today at 2959. Today 11 follies were measured.  I asked the nurse about this and she said there could be more, but it was hard to count in my right ovary because it was hiding behind my uterus (it houses the most follies), but total counted 15.  Largest follie measuring 21.5, with one at 18, 2 over 16, the rest 13s and 14s with one at 8.  So hopefully the laggers get up to at least 15 tomorrow. I'm going to continue with the current dosing.  I did buy one more cetrotide but it looks like i'll be triggering tomorrow.  The good news is that my pharmacy buys back all unused meds (except for refrigerated ones) at same price.  So I sure will be taking back some menopur and gonal f at my retrieval. 

In other news...I'm really gassy (not sure if its me or the meds), bloated and my boobs hurt like HAYLE...I can't lay on them, touch them...nada.....but I'll welcome it for a BFP and healthy take home baby.

Grow Lining grow.....and yea...you too follies..:-)

Stim Day 9

Had another visit today.  My E2 skyrocketted to 2473, so they want me to decrease my menopur to 150mg nightly, which is great because it means that I don't have to buy any more.  They think i'll stim for another day or 2 so will definitely need another cetrotide.  Follies are growing nicely.  There were 12 measured, and 2 not measured for a total of ????14???? WOWZERS.....Now if only my lining will cooperate, we will be to a good start.  Lining at 5.0mm :-(.  The nurse says it usually jumbs during the last day of stims.  Crossing my fingers...

On another note, tonight i had to give myself the shots on a ......Cruise ship.   I went out with my girlfriend and had to take the meds with me.  Mind you, she doesn't know about my IVF cycle. So at 10pm, I excused myself and went to the bathroom.  I tried to pre-fill the syringes so that I would just have to inject myself, but, after reading the med inserts, it said to not store meds in syringe.  So that idea went out the window.  I did mix the gonal f since it is multi-dose, and just put the saline in the syringe for the menopur. 

So here I am, in the bathroom, people knocking on the door.  i have my stuff spread out.  I have the menopur in the air, drawing out the liquid, and low and behold, someone opens the damn door...REALLY!!!!!!! Do you not see my feet???

I hope she didn't see all the needles and vials...another crackhead moment. 

So I gathered my things and went to another stall because i realized the lock didn't work properly and it was just too stressful.  And to make matters worse, her table was next to mine.  But whatever, I could have been giving myself insulin.....is this what insulin dependent diabetics have to go through...YIKES!

Stim Day 8

Thinks are looking good.  My e2 went up up to 1401.  I had 2 follies at 15, 2 at 14, 2 at 13, 2 and 12, one at 11 and one at 7.5.  Lining still sucks...i think it went down to 5.1????? RE still not worried so we'll see. I'm going to stay on current dosage.  I may need more menopur and cetrotide depending on what happens tomorrow.

Back tomorrow for more BW/US

Stims Day 6

Had my bw/us done yesterday. I'm progressing well. Still with 12 follicles, 7 measuring somewhere between 9, 11, 12, 13.  My e2 is 715 and lining 5.8mm.  I'm not too happy about my lining. I guess that would explain my light periods. I'm starting to believe that that may have been a cause of my miscarriages. My RE doesn't seem too concerned since it will continue to grow, and I'll be started on estrace and progesterone.  I also started cetritide last night and will be taking one vial each morning, my Menopur dose was increased to 225g nightly.

Tonight I had to give myself the injections in my car. I got off later than I expected last night so I didn't give myself the shots until 10:45pm, which is not so bad since i usually do it around 10, and I have an hour leeway. So picture this: me sitting in my car at DuPont circle with needles and vials...can you say crack head....not a good look.  People kept walking by and one Mexican just stood by the fence near my car, digging for gold in his nostril... "Hey, I'm trying to have a baby here, move". Anyway, I got the shots without incident and was thankful that I wasn't spotted by the police. Now that would have been interesting.

Back for more poking in the AM. I must say, so far so good with the shots. No bruising, no pain except with Menopur, and no side effects.

Stims Day 4 bw/us

I had my Day 4 bw/us today.  I was super nervous.  Mainly because I thought I screwed up the first dosing of my injectables and literally traveling with my meds ALL weekend. . I still to this day don't know why the 2nd vial of  menopur was liquid..oh well.  And I have this fear about menopause, and my period acting funny this month did not help.  I wouldn't say that I bled, but I had like bloody residue...like old blood or something coming out.  It was really weird.  I'm guessing it had something to do with starting BCPs later in my cycle...:shrug: I don't know.

Anyway, so you read all these stories about people not producing eggs with stims...blah blah..so I was a little worried. But low and behold, all is well. When I left the appt, the nurse told me she counted 10 follies, some around 8mm and 10mm.  I was SUPER happy.  I didn't expect them to be so big after only 3 days of stims.  I then got a call later in the, and there were 12.... That made me SUPER happy and my estrogen was at 233....YIPPEEEEE...I know that this is still very early and I have a LONG way to go...but i'm happy to still be in the running......I HAVE FOLLIES......

My next appt is in 2 days.  I'm to continue the menopur and gonal F at 150, no change.  Knowing that this stuff is working makes it sooo much easier to stick myself at night.  Although the menopur stings a bit, its a small price to pay...among all the other prices and the end result.  I've read that letting menopur sit for about 5 min after drawing it up my help.  So instead of doing drawing up gonal f firt, i'll try doing menopur first....